This Gringo's margarita

It is hard to believe I have been here exactly a month today.  I would like to say my Spanish is improving with leaps and bounds, but since this is true immersion it is very difficult to say.  It feels like I am not progressing at all, but I guess I am.  Looking at pictures of products can be very helpful.  I know it sounds simple to go to the grocery store and select a product, or try on clothes at the mall; but it is not for this gringo.

For instance, if I wasn't a child of the 60s, would I know what this is?  I think I would just assume people have tigers to feed in Chile.  AND, they appear to like this food.

You can't just go to google and translate Zucaritas... you just can't.  Again, this seems simple and isolated but let me tell you it permeates every part of your life.  It took Buddy AND I and hour just to get the clothes washer to wash correctly.  Soap in correct bin, dial to correct position. 

Below is a pic of the dial for my microwave.  I'll give you a hint:  it is a microwave and convection toaster.  The sad part of this, is it is in English. 

On the other hand I have found things that are so simple that I can't believe we haven't discovered this in the U.S.

 

For instance has anyone seen this at home:

 

A sponge that hangs on faucet to dry.  Doesn't this make a load of sense. I know I have not seen this at HEB.

 

Here again.  What is wrong/different about this picture? At home we would just say the napkin holder fell over.  In fact, every time buddy and I ate out we would keep standing it up, while the waiter would keep laying it down.  Of course it makes more sense to lay it down.  What were we thinking?

 

 

So as  you can see one month here and we have got the buying the tiger cereal, clothes washing, the sponge hanging and the napkin positioning down.  Oh, you say I forgot the microwave.  No, we still don't understand it.  Every once in a while I find the correct position and order of button pushing, and poof, it works very well.  However, it involves about 5 steps.  Go figure.  It just makes warming up food a surprise.

 

I miss all of you, but really wish you were here to experience life as a gringo with troubling Spanish. 

 

Buddy had a colleague that visited from the U.K.  She knew not one word of Spanish the first day.  On the second day she said she knew a few words.  I figured it was bathroom, hi, or thank you.  She very seriously said otro. 

 

You see the Chileans are very well known for their pisco sours.  A drink non unlike our precious margaritas.  They come in smaller glasses very similar to a champagne glass (which makes it difficult to only drink one)  I really thought I would miss margaritas terribly, put these pisco's are VERY good.  SO, the one word she knew well, "otro" means another.  Implying of course another pisco sour.

 

If you do come, put this word down "otro."  Don't worry about bathroom or niceties.  You can start your Spanish right in the airport and order pisco sours one right after the other before you even visit my home.; and, you can do it all in Spanish.

 

From Texas to Chile..............or should I say from Margaritas to Pisco Sours

Si, smile and nod

I am trying very hard to expose myself to the people, culture and language.  I thought I could create my own immersion.  In reality this could take awhile.  In the meantime each day has a comical learning experience.

The problem lies in that being around Spanglish in Texas one assumes that there are a few common English words that can keep the conversation alive.  I, apparently, took that assumption into a whole other country and culture.  WRONG.  The outcome is that as soon as I cannot recall a verb to bunch my nouns (that I do remember) together the possibility of an interaction comes to a painful screeching halt.  Not to mention it is easier to speak than to understand.

My day begins with my interpreter leaving me to my own devices (or lack thereof)

So the standard mode of recovery is say Si, then smile and nod.  On an adventurous day it will be precluded by Lo siento, Hablo un poco (I am sorry, I speak a little Spanish).

This strategy gets me by, but 90% of the time doesn't get me what I want. 

An example being.  Many things can happen at a store.  One, you must always get a bar code from a lady near the produce or bread section.  If you do not, the cashier has to run back into the store to do so.  This give you time to say Lo siento at least 5 or 6 times to all of the customers behind you.  Smiling all the while.  Once the cashier returns there will be a string of questions that follows.  I cannot image what they are.....donating to a cause, cash back, etc.  So in the grocery store I have learned to so No and smile at the cashier.

Sunday at the grocery store.  You cannot tell me this makes Costco look easy?

So many potential people to get mad at this gringo in front of the line.

While in small department stores you must "check out" at one counter then take your receipt to another to pay.  Your product is then transported to that counter.  What is up with that?  There seems to be no practical since especially in very small stores.  All I can think of is it keeps theft at a minimum among employees.  It seems highly unlikely for theft from anyone since all stores are manned with guards everywhere.  Smile and nod, smile and nod.

I can't seem to get down the proper response when I want to take my food with me; or leftovers boxed to go home.  This is very frustrating.  You can get very good pizza here and since I spend most of my day alone one day I decided to sit outside and get a pizza (by the way they are served as one size....large).  After eating my fill I was dying to take home for lunches later.  I was all set to ask for it to go (thanks to my handy dandy Iphone permanently planted on the Spanish dictionary website).  I thought I was very clear in my Spanish statement, but when the waiter tried to confirm what I said, I said "Si, smiled and nodded."  I apparently agreed that I did not want it.  Adios pizza pie.

This to me is the saddest part of my day, my neighborhood grocery (local style 7/11).  It is right outside my front door.  It is so easy to get milk or eggs.  Just a few steps away.  A few steps away from constant humiliation that is.  I cannot for the life of me understand the owners pronunciation of my total owed.  Since it is small they have no cash register, just a calculator.  I try hard, very hard each time.  I find myself always taking large bills to pretend I understand but need change.  In the end he now just turns the calculator around for me to see.  Sad, sad state of affairs.  You would think that would be the end of the pain.  However, learning to count out the gazillion kinds of thousands of pesos is humiliating in and of itself.  For an example 5000 pesos is about $10.  Not to mention there is many different looking $1000 bills.  No, not just one, but a few..... and in lovely different sizes to beat.  What is up with that too?

So I guess my lesson shouldn't be to say Si, but rather No.  However, once you say no it must be followed with a statement or conversation.  At this point losing my pizza is better than yet another painful attempt to converse.  In other situations assume nothing and hand over a $20000 bill.  All of which will at least put you in a safe zone for your ego.

Here is the place wherein I divulge to Buddy the comical day of learning from his esposa's Chilean experience.

...........so while in Chile say Si, smile and nod.......or maybe not......

.....................................just smile I guess................

From Texas to Chile

Cindy

There are no jalapenos in Chile

Post #1  Arriving In Chile from Texas.  THERE ARE NO JALAPENOS IN CHILE

Hello all.  I have decided to try to document my move to Chile.  This is the first of many crazy encounters I have already had.

Culture shock is not a term I would use lightly in this particular situation.  I don't know who was more stunned, me or my dog Nakita.  She at least had good reason being that the long flight here completely dehydrated her.  Not to mention in 9 hours she had to transform from a country dog to a city slicker pooch.  But she at least did not have to learn a different language, at least I don't think she did.

Trying to get through immigration and customs looks as bad as it appears. It seemed like hours.  I think it was hours.

We finally got to our apartment with our 8 bags and a large canine. 

Pay close attention to the beautiful glass doors (walls).  These open almost completely like a wall.  We have these all over the apartment.  This one opens up into our terrace

Within 10 seconds of arriving, I took Nakita to the terrace.  The landlord was opening the door, or so I thought.  Lets just say the cleaning lady must have used a great product on the window.  I walked smack dab into the glass.  I am surprised I didn't break it.  I knocked my glasses and got a knot on my head.  The landlord must have thought what crazies he must have rented to.

Here is the kitchen wherein no mexican food will be cooked.  We thought it would, at least to some degree, ..... but no.

We went in search of Jalapenos everywhere.  I have walked miles, literally to many many grocery stores, but to no avale.  Yesterday we hopped aboard our new shiney bikes to go three miles up hill to a huge mercado (grocery store). 

Buddy had heard that they in deed would carry our precious texas produce.  There are no jalapenos in Chile.  I know this for sure.  Just so you know.


Most of you are now thinking "she just made all this crap up."  Buddy wouldn't be living in an apartment, have no truck or car, ride a bike to work and live without jalapenos.  It does sound far fetched I agree.  But this is our life so far

............from texas to Chile...............

Miss you all

Cindy (or pronounced Ceeeeendy)

 

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